In L.A., the relationship between the vitality of your artistic vision and the quality of your vegetables are usually in exact inverse proportion. Get to know the best spots to find pesticide-free locorro blossoms and sprouted live hummus: you’ll need it when you have to throw a dinner party for Deliotte & Touche’s junior staff who are interested in something dramatic to compliment their foyer.

There is no activity more synonymous with aesthetic savvy and upward mobility than purchasing furniture. You get all the status of home ownership with the ability, nay, obligation to pack it full of neat objects that represent your unique sensibilities. And after you’ve fallen for each other, you can return to make the interior transition from grandma-chic to Art Deco to icy, sterile modernism in one not-at-all metaphorical fell swoop here.

One frequent byproduct of “moving in to save on rent” with a cash-rich amour is the swift adoption of a dog. It’s your audition for potential fatherhood, so god forbid you don’t give the poor creature all the healthful physical activity and sunshine you yourself have never enjoyed.

There’s a bevy of these “Intro to Excessive Adjectives” wine shops sprouting up around town (55 Degrees, the actually-quite-charming Colorado Wine Company). But for real, uncut purchasing power disguised as a sensitive palette, go straight to the source. Learn what vintage compliments your new Demerol prescription, and parse the hints of oak and blackcurrant in the taste of a dream deferred.