When Soundboard first heard the insidious, summery jingle advertising Subway’s new (and recession-friendly!) deal for $5 foot-long subs, we had no choice but to admire its weird pop craftsmanship and go buy a bunch of sandwiches. The weird, muted vocal harmonies, that unexpected Beatles-y shift to a minor modality in the verse; seriously, if Earlimart wrote a similar song about foot-longs as a tribute to Bingo, the mayor of Silver Lake, it’d be the smash single of May. But when we discovered that there is an extended dance remix available for download right now, we were forced to ask some uncomfortable questions about pop music: Are the sandwich-centric lyrics the only thing preventing this from being boilerplate respectable blog-house? Who out there is currently on the fence about Subway sandwiches, but upon hearing this dance remix, will be convinced of their need for a Veggie Delight on honey oat bread? Am I that person? Are commercial jingles the ultimate expression of pop utilitarian bent, or its most insipid? In an age where the sellout stigmas have lost their fangs and even radical leftist indie acts gladly license tunes to Nike, what will become of the professional jingle auteur? Did I really just devote 182 words to blogging about a sandwich-promoting dance remix? Either way, Happy Gilmore is stoked right now.
– August Brown











